Well, since you ask me for a tale of poetry

I believe I do have a timeline of events that you might find informative.

Currently in Chronological order
  1. 1924 – York

    Newt is teaching his class about Plato and Aristotle.

    He explains that Aristotle was wrong to claim that heavy things fall faster than lighter things. He uses a short poem to remind them of this:

    Whether they’re large or whether they’re small,
    Has no effect on the rate which things fall.
    But whether you choose to accept this or not-le,
    Depends on your faith in that fool, Aristotle.

    He asks one of his students, Spencer, who it was that proved Aristotle wrong in 1592. Spencer, who had not been listening, incorrectly guesses Plato. The answer was Galileo.

  2. 1940 – Marylebone

    Newt is approached by a former student of his, Spencer, who is now working for the Special Operations Executive (SOE) – a secretive World War II organisation.

    Spencer explains that the SOE communicates with field agents using “poem codes”. The message sender and recipient encrypt their messages based on an agreed upon passage of text. For security, this text must be carried in the agent’s head, but not be something well known generally.

    The passages need to be intensely memorable, unpredictable and, ideally, consist of twenty-six words.

    Spencer recalled the rhymes that Newt used to teach him in class as memory aids, and thought that Newt could help with this. He tells him that suitable passages were in great demand.

    Newt is amused and honoured by the idea that his nonsense poems could help with the war effort. He agrees to help and adds that he will also enlist the help of his nephew, Jerry.

  3. 1943 – Spetwith

    Uncle Newt is telling Jerry a bedtime story. The final line says that the villagers sang “paeans of praise” to their returning hero.

    When asked by Jerry, Uncle Newt explains that a paean is “a long poem about how wonderful you are”. Jerry asks if he can have one. Uncle Newt tells him that he can maybe have one for his birthday.

    They wish each other goodnight, to which Jerry adds: “Don’t let the bedbugs bite.”

  4. 1943 – Spetwith

    Jerry is celebrating his “unofficial” 8th birthday with Uncle Newt, with whom he is living during the war. His “official” birthday will be in December, when his parents are home on leave.

    After first hearing Jerry’s latest poem, for which Jerry is paid his standard ha’penny, Uncle Newt gives him his birthday presents.

    Jerry opens a gift to find a kazoo, which Uncle Newt admits he had just found at the back of a drawer.

    Uncle Newt encourages Jerry to blow the kazoo, which cues Newt to deliver a “paean of praise” that he has written for Jerry. The paean tells of Jerry’s accomplishments and good deeds while living with his uncle.

    Unbeknownst to Jerry, his mother, Vanessa, has taken leave from her war service, so that she can visit. She arrives in the room as Uncle Newt is finishing his paean. She delivers the final word: “Surprise!”

  5. 1944 – Spetwith

    Jerry approaches Uncle Newt with a new poem for the ditty box. It relies on a play on words about an aardvark having two eyes and two ‘A’s.

    Newt deems the verse worthy of the standard ha’penny fee, but also offers some advice for improvement.

  6. 1945 – Coventry

    Jerry visits his mother, Vanessa, in hospital. She is wrapped in bandages. She informs Jerry that she sustained her injuries when she was hit by a bridge.

    Vanessa tells Jerry that, once she is discharged from hospital, she will be returning home from her service on the narrowboat.

    Jerry is partly disappointed by this news. This means he will stop living with Uncle Newt, who has been teaching him to write poetry.

  7. 1975 – Hook Norton

    A stranger with a foreign accent approaches Newt and addresses him as Mr. Nightingale. Newt asks if he had taught the man years ago.

    The man tells him they have never met, but that he had always wanted to meet him. He then recites this short poem:

    I had a walrus for a pet.
    Why I bought it, I forget.
    I fed it kedgeree and rusks,
    And used best Blanco on his tusks.

    From the style of the rhyme, Newt recognises it as something written by himself or Jerry. He remarks that animals and kings were their speciality.

    Newt is gratified to hear that the man had remembered the verse for all these years and that it had “worked”.

  8. 1988 – Nottingham

    On the way to the reception of Myra’s wedding, Uncle Newt, Vanessa, Jerry, Deborah and Russ share a car. They represent five generations of the family.

    Deborah is surprised to hear Jerry ask if he should start his speech with a poem, since she had just assumed that he would.

    Vanessa and Deborah swap theories about the marital status of the registrar at the service, based on their observations of biro marks and reading glasses.

    As they travel, Russ starts to feel unwell. Uncle Newt offers his top hat, should it be needed.

    In an attempt to distract Russ, they all start to play a storytelling game by each saying one word at a time, but this fizzles out as Russ feels worse.

    Next, they try to think of a song which they all know so that they could sing it to Russ. Uncle Newt is too elderly to know Yellow Submarine and Deborah is too young for Knees Up Mother Brown, but there is one song which spans the generations of the family.

    Jerry counts them in and they all sing Woof, Woof, Woof together.

    Unfortunately, they cannot prevent the inevitable, and Deborah is forced to apologise to Uncle Newt.

    Newt replies: “Oh, not at all my dear. It was a very old hat.”

  9. 1990 – Long Buckby

    At Vanessa’s funeral, Jerry is surprised to find that Uncle Newt is wearing the same hat as he wore to Myra’s wedding. Newt remarks that it is an awfully resilient thing.

    Jerry’s daughter has just spoken to him to ensure that he will not do a poem at the funeral. When Uncle Newt hears this, he suggests that Jerry should do one for Newt’s own funeral, when the day comes.

    Uncle Newt says that he would pay Jerry his fee for the poem in advance, except that ha’pennies are no longer produced. He reacts with mock outrage when Jerry suggests that he pay him a whole penny instead.

  10. 1991 – Hook Norton

    At Uncle Newt’s funeral, Jerry gives a eulogy in the form of a poem that he has composed about Newt.

    In the poem, Jerry tells the audience of the years he spent living with Newt during the war. It was there that Jerry first started writing rhymes, for which Newt would pay him a ha’penny each (on condition that they scan).

    He praises Newt as a teacher, storyteller and friend, before concluding with the lines:

    Well, since you ask me for a toast…
    O Nightingale! O Uncle Newt!